You almost made me cry.
It wasn’t probably easy reaching out, especially that you always seemed restrained if not difficult and obnoxious.
Maybe, that was some side of the real you.
Maybe, you were not a stranger.
Maybe, just maybe, you were actually a friend.
reading a local paper a while ago, i saw an article on ryan agoncillo. of course he's my crush (why else would i bother to write about him here?) so he's with judy ann santos now? nah, i've nothing against her. much as i've never gotten over him, i know when to back off (ha! ha!) They are cute.
Amazing! It’s simply amazing and fascinating to lurk and visit so many places and spaces while sitting comfortably and sipping your fave chai tea. Ah, to be a slacker…it’s a sin I know, this indolence, but…for a lot out there, my guess is that they’d tell it’s a way of life. There are gazillion people who are ummm (borrowing castells) in the "network society"; living in the "timeless time" and "space of flows". You know, those who are “switched on” [at the same time that there are those who are worried of where to get the next meal, those who don’t even have an access to the “information highway”, those who are ripped off of their settlement, etc. etc. etc.]
we used to have the gypsies, hippies, ummmm then there was (or is) generation x..hah!!! what now? attack of the blogger-butts??!!!??? different places/different spaces; new means/new venues; variety/diversity; but something's constant...the world is here, there and everywhere {ha!ha! beatles}...south of the border, north of the sun {HM}; south of somewhere, north of nowhere {e-heads} in the space between (dmb) the blackhole sun (bush) across the universe...nah...i'm outta here...
I never had sleeping problems, not until recently when i moved to the "center". Whoever’s doing it, ‘it’ has forgotten to wind-up my clock so that normally, day becomes night and night becomes day. Either that or it’s the vampire streak manifesting (as usual, shall I add?)…….
After falling asleep at last (having finished 4 books, no kidding) with steve martin’s “the pleasure of my company” crumpled on my side (would've been the 5th for that night./day/whatever), I was suddenly jolted into complete wakefulness, as in “complete” mind you, the kind that feels like you’ve never gone to sleep at all. Hah! Michael Bublé was serenading me! (I must now agree to those who say that dawn is the best time to study because your mind absorbs accurately and effortlessly). At the risk of turning my blog into a songbook, here’s what I picked up from what Michael was singing:
Another summer day, has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome, But I wanna go home
Maybe surrounded by a million people
But I still feel all alone, I just wanna go home
Oh I miss you, you know
And I've been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two "I'm fine baby, how are you?"
Well I would send them but I know that it's just not enough
My words were cold and flat and you deserve more than that
Another aerorplane, (the picture of aeroplane suddenly comes to mind...)
Another sunny place, I'm lucky I know
But I wanna go home, I've got to go home
Let me go home I'm just too far from where you are
I wanna come home
And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life
It's like I just stepped outside when everything was going right
And I know just why you could not come along with me, coz this was not your dream
But you always believe in me
Another winter day has come and gone away
And even Paris and Rome, I wanna go home, Let me go home
And I'm surrounded by a million people I still feel alone
Let go home, I miss you, you know...Let me go home I've had my run
Baby I'm done, I gotta go home. Let me go home It will be all right
I'll be home tonight, I'm coming back home....
Ah, I wanted to tell him I'd go to Paris or Rome with him (even if I prefer Amsterdam) ha!ha! with those soothing voice who wouldn't?
Frankly, I just don't want to go home yet, but it surely touched a raw nerve…He just made me sad.... But I let him finish just the same, before turning on my CD, which turns out to be a bad idea. It’s Sarah McLachlan belting out… I will remember you, Will you remember me? Don’t let your life pass you by;
Weep not for the memories.
I’m so tired but I can’t sleep, Standin’ on the edge of something much too deep
It’s funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can’t be heard....
I’m so afraid to love you, but more afraid to lose
Clinging to a past that doesn’t let me choose…
Bloody hell…I am wide awake again, and these cheesy lovesongs are all over my head and it's monday (argghhhhh....) and...nah, i better stop!
By the way, how come the witches and wizards are celebrating christmas? yeah i'm talking about harry potter (book 5 was one of the four i devoured last night or day or whatever). i didn't know they also rejoice on the nativity of Jesus (well it is touching i guess) but you know what i'm saying? they surely have voldemort, not lucifer or satan as their dark lord, but...ahhh, might as well ask JK Rowling how'd she reconciled the idea.
kiting just sent me some pics and i dared not open them at first (actually i haven't taken a good look at them). ang weird weird i-realize ang katotohanan...the worst fear i have already happened and i feel like i'm in two realms at the same time if that's possible. creepy huh?
what i sorely miss are encounters like these:
Act I
one full moon during my semestral break, smoke's all over our house. after several exasperating attempts, he managed to wake me up.
Apple: wake up, your pillow's on fire!
Me: nah...it's just your imagination, go back to sleep.
Apple: don't tell me i did not warn you.
after ten minutes or so....
Apple: (calmly) your pillow is almost eaten up by fire you know
Me: it's just the moonshadow....
Apple: no, just open your eyes and take a quick look and i'll let it drop...common do it...
Ah, to be disrupted from doing one of the things that gives you pleasure.... so i opened my eyes (bad move) and saw that my pillow was indeed burning.
Me: (dejectedly) ok i conceed. it's really burning.
Apple: (gloating) i told you so
Me: (suddenly warfreak) I can't believe you didn't put out the fire yourself!
Apple: (unperturbed) coz i need you to see it for yourself so you may differentiate moonshadow from smoke!
Grow up and clean after your mess, throw it out before your mom finds out.
Cool dad eh?
Act II
My mom is so fond of doing incense which he disapproved of because of the smell and the smoke it elicits.
Dad: What do you that for anyway?
Mom: (self-assuredly) To shoo away bad spirits!
Dad: Nah...you might as well stop it coz it's not effective.
Mom: how could you say so?
Dad: Coz you're still here....
(Oh, he emereged just fine then. my mom is equally a cool sport!)
winner di ba? kaloka talaga...damn! to not hear nor experience those funny encounters ever again....
Pearls and swine, bereft of me
long and weary my road has been
I was lost in the cities
Alone in the hills
No sorrow or pity for leaving I feel
I am not your rolling wheels, I am the highway
I am not your carpet ride, I am the sky
Friends and liars
Dont wait for me
'Cause Ill get on all by myself
I put millions of miles under my heels
And still too close to youI feel...
I am not your rolling wheels, I am the highway
I am not your carpet ride, I am the sky
I am not your blowing wind, I am the lightning
I am not your autumn moon, I am the night
The night....
excuse me, can't help it...'simply love this song!
anyway, tell me, how could something crazy to begin with could go on crazily despite the craziness of it? (blah blah blah, just crazy over the word crazy).
