house of a freespirit

one year of keeping the spirit

Horoscope for December 29, 2005

Sagittarius (Nov 22 - Dec 21)

Your personal confidence can truly inspire others right now to an amazing degree. It's heartening for someone who's perhaps a little more timid to see how you're engaging with life -- in a spirit of optimism, with a warm heart and a fearless attitude. The way that you handle -- nay, welcome -- the unexpected lets others see that a flexible attitude can be extremely rewarding, and that exploring what's around and within you makes life far more worth living.

absurdity

Currently listening to:
IN BETWEEN DREAMS (Jack Johnson)
Currently playing track: Crying Shame

"We're all burning under the same sun, by now we say it's a war for peace; It's the same old game, but do we really want to play? We could close our eyes, it's still there; We could say it's us against them; We can try but nobody wins, gravity has got a hold on us all...it's a crying, crying shame...."

On Saturday, after 10,000 years of planning to open an account in another bank, I finally managed to drag my arse with the usual requirements. The account rep. was a very nice Chinese (Hongkongite? geez, how do you actually call the citizens of Hongkong? Seriosuly?) I know, I know. For a former student of IS, I truly suck. Anyway, she was very nice, her carefully worded but short of blunt refusal didn't sound so bad (on a personal level).

First, she asked if I'm a US citizen or a permanent resident. In short, my immigation status. I said I'm a non-immigrant. I hold a working visa. So which country are you from? Philippines, I said. The thing, she said, was that it may take a few weeks, if not months for them to first verify my info, and next, to actually issue an approval because the Philippines is included in "the watch-list of money launderers". So she goes, you have to justify why you're opening an account, what your money sources are, we need your employment certification blah, blah, blah...I replied, "you're not kidding, are you?" Unfortunately no, she said, but we can do it if you would be patient and bear with us as we go through all "the usual verification process". Uh, ok thanks, I said and left.

To begin with, patience is not really one of my limited virtues. Secondly, I have no money to launder. Thirdly, I only have my salary as a source of income. Honest, I have no benefactor. Justify my openning of an account? Tough indeed for someone who doesn't have money to put into that which won't be created checking account! For an instant I was actually tempted to say, because I am Imee...(ok not so funny. But I am Imee M.)


Indeed, "at any street corner, the feeling of absurdity can strike any man in the face."


***********************
I like to read. And I tell you, in the instances that the Philippines (or its citizens) was (or were) mentioned in the fiction books I've read, it's almost always on a sad note. Try Eleven Minutes by Coelho. The Filipina character there who's considered a friend by the female lead character works as a prostitute. In Mitch Albom's "The Five People You Meet in Heaven", the character who was a soldier had been assigned in Mindanao, where he was tortured and held hostage. Yes, I get you, these are fictions. That surely did not come out of thin air, is what I'm saying. In Audrey Hepburn's biography, she used us as an example, along some African countries, of those with high incidence of poverty. She was delivering a speech before the UN, seeking for support/financial assistance.


I seldom feel, but I tell you, I HURT. For my country.

***************************
I just finished browsing through all the accumulating e-mails i've been getting. One of those talks about the 'development" in the traditional Oblation Run. Which I've only "seriously" seen just now. Oh well, equal rights? Some of my female friends are reacting disapprovingly, actually. Hmmm...now it's men having the chance to ogle? So who are they, the APO sisses? Or just anybody who wanted to participate? Let's dig this sometime. Or you tell me what you think...

***************************
Happy birthday to my sis, Ate Anet.

walking in a winter wondering...

Currently listening to: Smashing Pumpkins
Album: Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness (yeah the pic is from amazon hence the 13% discount chuchu)
Currently Playing track: To Forgive

"i'm not the same but i feel the same, i feel nothing, holding back the fool again; holding back the fool pretends, i forget to forget, nothing is important...holding back the fool again, i forget to forget me, i forget to forget you see..."

Wednesday, day2 of the transport strike: I was walking in the winter, wondering...

No one to hitch a ride with today (yesterday actually). I hailed a cab that wasn't moving. Looks like I was going to (a) grow a beard, (b) enlarge my arse, (c) split my eardrums, (d) all of the above after ten minutes in complete standstill (i kid you not) and heavy honking around me, not to mention the irritating xmas songs playing on Mr. Cab Driver's car stereo. So the impatient me paid her due, thanked Mr. Cab Driver and got her arse off, leaving it for many other takers. and thus began my first long walk on a winter. it wasn't exactly a wonderland, but it's facsinating to see fellow hikers and wondering what are they thinking.

Initially i was thinking of B's "curse" shall i say? Last spring, I was all set to move into his place, but i backed out realizing how far it is from the subway station. This guy drives to work so he doesn't care. After a decade, we met at a party last Friday. He said that I'm ok now, but i should have lost 10 lbs. already had i moved into his place because of the daily walks to the subway {reeks bitterness}. He suggested I get off at sixty-ish and walk from there to work {in midtown} daily. He's got the nerve to say on day 1 of the strike that my prayers have been answered. Well, it wasn't my prayer. It was his, but just the same, I got the clear idea of how it must have felt. Funnily though, we do lunch in a buffet korean resto on day 1 and yest, day 2, we had another buffet round in a jap resto. Yummy seafoods galore! {Talk about law of compensation}.

Actually, it's nice to walk. Despite the biting cold, I mean, at least you don't perspire. Imagine if it's summer, i'm sure we're all drenched and sweaty before we reach our respective destinations! Unless you carry a rucksack for a change of clothing which is not exactly encouraging for a lazybone like me.

The distance in a more familiar terms? My estimation is it's about the IKOT jeep route, thrice. Yeah, I was also thinking about how convenient it is that New Yorkers have numbers for their streets and avenues. I mean, you're a total dumb-arse if you get lost. just a simple arithmethic, or let's say a sorting matter on a descending or ascending order depending on where you're going. Ergo, relatively new that I am, I managed to make it at work, in time for the buffet lunch. ewwww!!!!

Later on I was smiling as i imagine if we would have to do this back home. You go, "which way to so and so" and they tell you, most likely, "if you see jollibee, you turn right, couple of blocks you'll see a sari-sari store, blah blah blah..." Your native land, imagine, in your native language, but i guess five streets and seven turns after, you feel lost already, not to mention the traffic and the traffic aide who's most probably ready to pounce on you for cash should you make a violation. (talk about expediting the settlement. pronto!) Hmmm, the last time I walk back home was when I went to EDSA II, from UP to Ortigas...Now that wasn't so bad after all.

Oh well, time for REM. I need energy for another exciting journey later.

what's your story, morning glory?

Currently listening to Dishwalla
Currently playing track: somewhere in the middle of this

tripping hard falling down onto the ground,
cause I can't stand up and I can't fall down,
cause I'm somewhere in the middle of this
(just perfect, perfectly just)

today, or yesterday actually, the transport strike pushed through, after all. i was hoping it won't, cause like a million other commuters, i use the subway to go to work. my aunt was kind enough to advice me to pack my stuff and go to her place. from there i could take the bus, which is serviced by a private company, hence it won't be part of the strike and conveniently, it stops at port authority in 42nd street so basically, i could just walk all the way down to my office. the stubborn and slacker me simply won't start moving. {she was too tired to pack, it was too cold and she just wanted to hole up in the sac}.

at past two am, i saw at ny times on-line that no agreement was reached and the union was officially on strike. i was contemplating on whether to go to work or not. were I in the phil., i surely won't. (not that i need strike to stop me from going to work in the first place). and the thing here is that, it's business as usual. of course, the world still spins on its axis, i still have deadlines, etc. oh well...

now i'm reminded of college days. remember when the FEJODAP was on strike there were no classes. and then, students are all over SM North EDSA or Robinson's or Sta. Lucia Mall? aliw.

so what's the story? i don't have my broomstick and it's broad daylight hence i'm forbidden to use it. i called my friend but her carpet ride is also out of service and she herself was starting to walk. Where's Santa and his sleigh? i guess "olops" is also on strike, i mean he's been dragging santa's arse for quite a while now. tough luck huh? so anyway, like the usual folks, i hitched a ride with a kind hearted guy. i walked a few blocks and tonight we hitched another ride with a friend. who took hours to come because he got stuck somewhere. I managed to get home safe at around 10pm. thank God. in the grand scheme of things, i was ok. see, my colleague had to fall in line for three hours for the LIRR, just to get a ticket that was never inspected by the conductor anyhow!

tomorrow's another story. at least in the phil you have cabs, fxs, jeeps, bus etc...i don't really mind walking, i could use plenty of exercise after all. (you know burning the calories from the ice cream i'm eating right now). but it's too damn cold, honestly.

maybe i should just stay in my blackhole and watch the 3 two-sided discs of season 1 of house. or just lie down, with my pluffy pillows, freshly laundered and downy-smelling bed sheets. sleep all day. or catch up with so many things that i've been putting off. i mean, what can be a compelling reason to drag my arse out of the apartment? it's not as if i'm going to meet hugh jackman or david duchovny on the streets. yeah, who knows, maybe wolverine if not agent mulder is roaming somewhere. yeah, you chanced upon lenny kravitz once.... (i wonder if i'd ever see [him] again, but baby ain't it over til its over....ah, i suddenly miss my kravitz cd. he was ever on my playlist way way back)

************************************

i don't think i'm ever going to finish with my so-called xmas shopping. toooo many people in shopping malls as expected. everywhere actually. god. i can't bear with it. compounded by this strike. duh, worse than waiting for a cab that never comes after shopping in ayala malls or greenhills, i tell you. like about ten million people in line! damn. but i managed to wrap some stuff tonight. that much i like at least, wrapping gifts. and writing to few dear friends and sending each of them a xmas card that would surely come after ten years i guess. like those that i shopped on-line. perhaps, they too got stranded.

bye-bye blue

black is the new pink. and i feel like changing my template. into pink.

The Feast of Santa Claus

I just finished reading all the e-mails and birthday greetings to me at my friendster account. Although I intend to thank each one of you, it might take me awhile to actually get to it. So let it be heard here: many thanks to those who remembered me on my birthday, to those who took time to write to me and to those who called.

I laughed out loud on this: (I could've have linked this but I don't want to expose our respective e-mail addresses).

Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2005 09:41:16 -0800 (PST)
From: "Bonn J"
Subject: Happy Birthday!
To: "Xavier"

Kanta ako:

Happy Birthday to you! (2x)
Happy Birthday! (2x)
Happy Birthday to you!

I miss you, ImeeGirl. I really owe you a lot of kuwento.

Anyway, naaalala ko lang the last time we celebrated your birthday in your house. Ang daming handa at pagkain. Pinipilit mo nga ako na matulog sana roon sa kuwarto mo. Nanghihinayang tuloy ako ngayon, dapat pala pumayag na ako, may nangyari pa siguro sa atin, girlfriend na sana kita ngayon, hehe ;)!

I miss you, ImeeGirl. Wala lang, I just realize how cool you are. Sana you're here.

Ingat ka lagi ha.

I love you, friend.

Happy Birthday!

Cheers,
Bonn

Baby Bonn, it was only because the fragile you looked so drunk and I didn't want you on my conscience if something happened (it was me, myself and I that I was thinking). But thanks muchly. That's the spirit haha!

Yup Gary Ador D., I do remember. 'Twas my last birthday celeb in the Phil. Geez, do you realize that you wrote along the same lines as Bonn? uy!!!! kayo pa rin talaga. haha....

And I am deeply touched by this. Thanks Ate. By the way, it wasn't my birthday when xandro dropped by, it was actually Kim's birthday. The poor kid was complaining to his mom that I made him drank red horse har!har!

The picture you see was sent to me as an e-card. It looks so serene, and it reminds me of Puerto Galera. I posted it here to cap my entry. Hey, I assume you took this yourself but I guess you haven't applied for a copyright haha.

Please don't sue me :]

Kota Kinabalu Sunset

strawberry fields

Went to see what the fuss is all about. It was fun after all.

My camera ran out of battery, so I didn't get to take more pics as I would have wanted to. Besides, too damn cold. At least I have some shots this time, unlike when I watched U2's concert, I didn't have my cam with me.

As I look at John Lennon's apartment (bottom center) a guy was making some speech about people coming from all over the world to pay tribute (not all, some are just plain nosy). He was saying, "like this kid from Korea (pointing at me I realized), who was not even born at the time JL got killed." Then he goes on, "you are about 18, right?" drawing me nearer to his mini-audience for some affirmation. Geez...Thanks, but I'm not Korean (not again) and I'm 27, I said. He told me to fuck-off for lying like that. Duh! Oh well, we can indulge a little in the false flattery, after all, I just had my birthday barely a couple of days earlier and feeling the number haunting me somewhat har!har! Ah, good thing my friend came at this point so we headed straight to Central Park.

Initially I was just watching them jammin', and then sang with them like crazy later on. The guy at the top/center sang heartily I tell you, he kept me entertained for the most part. So did my friend who drew some crowd himself.

forces of nature?

This is what's happening in my province. Again. I talked about this here before, in connection with the tsunami last year, day after Christmas. Why does it usually happen on holiday season I wonder? The tsunami in Mindoro I was talking about happened towards the latter part of November 1994. Then a flood followed on my birthday (that was the year I totally forgot that it was my birthday because of the flooding), and again twice after Christmas...

Geez...talk about disasters. I mentioned that we had a disaster in our office just the day after thanksgiving. Simply put, it was like mini-Katrina rampaged our office. We barely become up and running this week. So with our internet connection restored, I was reading "Body Talk with Chiz Escudero" @ philstar online (I fancy him during my HOR stint. Imagine how he broke my heart when he came to the office personally handing his wedding invitation to my boss). I was still feeling nostalgic about Chiz, my ex, when I switched to inq7. And there, folks, I saw the depressing news, and my girly-crushy-once-in-a-decade-moment was completely shattered. (Lei, thanks for the forwarded link anyhow). I first thought about my bestfriend Aina, who has just given birth recently. Ains, I hope to God you and Linus are ok and evacuated right on time. I have quite a handful of friends from Calapan. My hometown, Socorro, was also flooded, so with some 7 other municipalities I think. Sad, sad, world...

Pestilences have a way of recurring in the world. Yet somehow we find it hard to believe in ones that crash down on our heads from a blue sky -- Albert Camus (The Plague)

children's concerns

Currently listening to: somewhere only we know [keane]

Remember my nephews? Well, I don't know what Gabby's problems are....

I think he's pretty much thirsty to begin with. That's the spirit kid.

Bottoms up to many blessings on my day and the years to come!!!

What is it now Gabo?

My sister texted me this:

I was having a massage because I had a headache and Gabby asks, "you're sick mama?" To which I replied "yes anak" (sounding very sickly indeed and touched at the same time for his show of concern). He retorts, "ah, that's what you get, bad ka kase." Smart kid. At two he knows physics. For every action there is equal or opposite reaction. Karma in other words.

My other sister, on the other hand, emailed me this:

Kim (or Bobby) is asking a baby from you because he doesn't want one from me. He already asked Tita Iting (my unmarried sis) but she refused to give him one so he said he is counting on you. In his own words, "Tita Aymi please send the baby soon. Make sure the baby has a smooth and silky skin." Hmmm...I didn't know he's changed his preferences? I thought he's contented with the rubber ducks and his pet goats his grandpa left him?

Now Ulikba is a completely different story altogether.

He wants a puppy or a kitten. But my asthmatic sis won't let him, thus he appeals to me to persuade her. Bro, I guess you've got to contend yourself with your fishes <:(((((<

These folks, are what I'm missing. God bless the people and those forces behind the internet technology and other digitized world. Without them, my world would be utterly dull...

rennovations and getting high

In the movie Horse Whisperer I think, kirstin or annie, the lead female character, said something along these lines: In New York, if you're still, the next thing you know is that they rennovated you. Hmmm...I've been in a standstill for sometime. I was neither here nor there, I just waited, intuitively. In New York, yes. Somebody asked me once, "how could you be in standstill in New York?" I answered that you can be stuck just about anywhere. You get stuck for as long as you allow yourself to. I guess that applies to other emotions as well. Anyway, now that I've resurfaced, I wonder if I had been rennovated?

Tina, one of my highly valued friends, emailed me recently and asked me if I still "take time to smell the flowers". [Jeez, REM is seranading me again at this very minute. I know, ok, everybody hurts. I recall, we were on our way to Canada, the very same weekend Apple had to be laid to his new home here on earth, this song was being played at the car stereo. In a superb summer day. Must be pards, telling me that. Arrghhhh....] Ok, going back here, I do, Tina. You see, Ohio, my new plant, has four new flowers, which I just smelled. Haha!!!! But that's true, I guess I do have a green thumb, I've got three plants now, thriving well.

Seriously now, you know for a fact that it doesn't really take much to make me happy. At around 3am earlier, I was sitting by the window, watching the first snow of this season. I can't pass this up. Last year, it was during my birthday, so that made my day then. I guess I'll never tire doing that, even if my friends tell me it's because I am just new here, hence the appreciation of these tiny white flakes that get dirty eventually. Well, I'd say, of the four seasons, I like winter most, with autumn closely tailing behind. The extremely biting cold, the wind seemingly attacking me yesterday morning as I borrowed some DVDs, later on sleeping with my freshly laundered sheets [that smell downy] and my fluffy pillows, and waking up today with the fresh snow drops on the ground, altogther, simply make me high. And then you smell the freshly brewed coffee. And you're tuned in to a local radio station on-line. (Haha, NU signed off, I realized it's Sunday pm there that's why. So I switched to jam).

Oh speaking of rennovations, damnation! It was a crazy and toxic week for all of us at work. We are forced to not just rennovate, but to reconstruct our whole office. Some waterpipe broke, they say, and our wing got flooded. If only I could post here the extent of the damage...but not this time. Let's just say it's akin to Miranda law, that's why. My colleague said it's relatively better with WTC. There and then, they did not see the damaged files. Nothing but feeling the terribly painful loss. Now, at ESB, we saw what had become of our valued files. They were helplessly lying there, soaked for days, chilling probably, completely ruined and then frozen. Some of them originals. And those were not just papers, you know. Those are practically people's lives. It's like dying instantly after a first massive heart attack vis-a-vis surviving, but finding yourself with a stroke afterwards. Our choices: (a) be resilient and survive, or (b) get stuck. Yeah, yeah, yeah, in the grand scheme of things, this is nothing.

Hmm..now it's billy singing landslide to me. I think I'm going to have a great day today.

Merry Christmas everyone! <:)((((<